Secret (1) is the fourteenth episode of Season 4 of the Canadian television series, Degrassi: The Next Generation. It originally aired on November 30, 2004 on CTV Television and on July 1, 2005 on The N.
Summary[]
Since the shooting, everyone's been walking on eggshells around Emma. She's tired of people feeling sorry for her and treating her differently. When she goes looking for a way to shake up her life, she finds it down in the ravine inside a van with Jay. She soon finds herself becoming someone she doesn't want to be, and carries the consequences of unspeakable acts she can't undo.
Meanwhile, with the discovery of Craig's bipolar disorder, Ashley, tries to get him help from a support group, only to find out Ellie attends the same one.
Extended Overview[]
With the Dracula play coming up in several days, everyone is practicing.
Backstage, Emma watches Danny practice. When Jay gets up and walks over to her, he startles her by rubbing her shoulders, stating she's tense. She replies that she is always tense. He rubs his hands down her arm and rubs her butt, leaving Emma slightly disturbed and confused.
Not hearing Danny call her onstage, or J.T., till the second or third time, Emma rushes on stage and says her lines with a bored Amy and Alex Nuñez. She looks back at Jay and he smirks at her.
Later, as Emma is leaving class, her teacher tells her that her participation grade has been dropping since the shooting. He tells her that he knows she went through a lot, but that she needs to get over it.
Emma doesn't say anything but walks away. As she turns the corner, she sees Alex and Jay making out by their locker. They both look at Emma awkwardly, then Jay tells her to take a picture and it'll last longer.
Alex dips in and humorously tells her that she can sell it online for pornographic money. Emma awkwardly ignores them and walks away with Jay watching her as she walks away.
Later, while rehearsing for the play, Darcy continuously forgets her lines. When she keeps asking for her lines, Emma blurts them out for her.
J.T. asks Liberty why she hired Darcy. Emma finishes the rest of Darcy's lines for her and Darcy gets upset, telling Emma that prompting is Liberty's job. Ms. Kwan, tells them all they should take a break.
J.T. tells Darcy that despite having two roles (directing and acting) that he knows his lines. He adds that maybe he should find someone else to play her role. Darcy realizes what he's saying and quits.
After rehearsal, Manny says they should cancel the play while they have the chance. Amy talks about how she should play 'Mina Virgin' Alex jokes, that's acting all right! Emma sits down, and places the hat on her, and says all the lines.
Manny tells her she should totally play Mina, but Emma declines and says that Darcy being gone doesn't mean she'll get the part.
Amy then begins to worry where her "special" bracelets are. Manny asks Emma, despite their strained relationship, to come over her house with Liberty where they were going to do makeovers.
Emma declines, saying it would be no fun with her there, and gets her jacket. She sees the bracelets Amy was talking about and hands them to Amy who snatches them away from Emma.
When Emma is walking home, Jay pulls up in his car and brags about how his car has more than 15 speakers. He offers her a ride. Emma accepts and gets in the car.
She begins to tell him her address, but he knows it already, having dropped her off after Sean went to stay at his parents' home. Emma says she misses him too, but Jay says that's not what he said, and told her not to get mushy.
When she gets home, Emma quietly walks into her house to hear her mom and dad discussing about how worried they are for her. They mention that Emma never brings friends over, doesn't go on dates, and how they think she hasn't gotten over the shooting.
Snake points out that none of the other students had a gun pointed at them, and that none of the other students watched someone die.
Emma puts on a happy face and acts as if she didn't hear their conversation. When they ask her if she's alright, she smiles and says she's totally fine.
Later that night, Emma laid in bed, bored. Manny calls her, but Emma ignored the call. She remembered what Jay had told her about the ravine and that she should come. So, she gets her jacket and sneaks out of the house to go to the ravine.
At the ravine, she sees kids smoking and drinking. Emma finds Jay; she asks him if he thinks she is weird. He tells her no, and that he thinks she's fine. Emma then sees Amy come out of a van, put a bracelet on her wrist, and walk away. Emma asks what's in the van, and Jay tells her he will show her.
When they get in the van, Jay kisses Emma who pulls away, startled. He tells her that the van is actually for hooking up. She asks him what he means by that, and he asks if she does know what blowjobs are (oral sex).
Emma tries to scurry out of the van, but Jay catches her and ties the bracelet around her wrist. He tells her that every player wins a prize. After he gives her the bracelet, Emma opens the van, gets out and runs away.
The next day, as Liberty tells J.T. how disappointed she is in him for firing Darcy, Emma stands up and says all of Mina's lines perfectly. J.T. is stunned. Liberty tells Emma that she needs a actress who is rock-solid ready. She assures Liberty that she is ready.
Liberty points out that she's been late for cues and that she didn't come over to Manny's house the night before and that everyone knows she's "off." Emma tells her she's not "off", and that she is their Mina.
Later, during rehearsal, J.T. tells everyone Emma is the new Mina. When rehearsal begins, Emma has to kiss Dracula, but she becomes embarrassed. After rehearsal, Amy and Alex mock Emma for not being comfortable kissing a boy on stage. Emma moves to pick an item up from the table, reaching past Amy and flaunting the wristband Jay had given her. Amy freaks out and asks if that wristband is hers. Emma tells her that it belongs to her. Outside, Emma runs to Jay and tells him what happened backstage and that the wristband is 'Amy-Kryptonite'.
Jay tells Emma she should shut up because she didn't earn the wristband and that Amy did. Emma questions Jay about him and Amy having oral sex. Jay tells Emma that there were many girls at the ravine last night, but he only wanted her.
Emma goes back to the ravine that night and asks for another 'tour'. Jay tells her that she already had the tour. Emma tells him she wants the real tour this time. Jay smiles and leads her into the van and oral sex is implied.
After having oral sex with Jay, Emma sneaks back home at 2:00 in the morning. Her parents catch her sneaking in; Emma breaks down crying and talks about being unable to get over the shooting that how she is scared. Her parents tell her they can always talk tomorrow, but Emma says there is nothing to worry about.
Snake and Spike leave and go to bed. Once they get upstairs, Emma smirks and looks at her bracelet.
Sub Plot[]
Ellie and Ashley are outside sitting at the lunch table. Ashley seems deep in thought, and Ellie flaunts her fashion magazine to get her out of the daze. Ashley tells her she's worried about Craig, Ellie tells her she shouldn't worry, and to take advice from the 'sicko' (herself). Craig comes over, asking who's a sicko. Ellie and Ashley change the subject. Ellie gets up and leave. Ashley asks Craig how he's been, and Craig abruptly asks her what she and Ellie had been talking about. Ashley asks him if he would go to a a support group. Craig tells her his desire to talk about something else than being Bipolar. She asks him to go for one session, assuring him that if he hates it he wouldn't have to go anymore. He says he will hate it but agrees to go.
At the support group session, people tell the group about how they are feeling and their experiences. As Craig tells everyone about his experiences, he is surprised to see Ellie enter the room.
Craig tells Ashley about how upset he was that she sent him to Ellie's group.
Ellie goes to Craig's house and asks him about guitars, but then reveals that the topic was just an excuse to talk to him. She tells Craig about her past of self-harm. Craig tells about his diagnosis with bipolar disorder. Ellie tries to cheer him up by saying Kurt Cobain was bipolar and that he'll be fine. Ellie also encourages Craig to call Ashley and apologize. She reminds him that Ashley really cares about him.
Ashley goes over to Craig's; Craig talks about how he just wants to be her boyfriend and to have normal conversations.
- This episode is named after the song “Secret” by Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark.
- Craig and Ellie became friends in this episode.
Regular Cast (Ordered Alphabetically)
- Sarah Barrable-Tishauer as Liberty Van Zandt
- Stefan Brogren as Archie Simpson
- Ryan Cooley as J.T. Yorke
- Jake Epstein as Craig Manning
- Stacey Farber as Ellie Nash
- Miriam McDonald as Emma Nelson
- Melissa McIntyre as Ashley Kerwin
- Cassie Steele as Manny Santos
- Amanda Stepto as Christine Nelson
Supporting Cast
- Dalmar Abuzeid as Danny Van Zandt
- Terence Bryant as Dr. Jim
- Deanna Casaluce as Alex Nuñez
- Bailey Corneal as Amy Peters-Hoffman
- Melissa DiMarco as Daphne Hatzilakos
- Shenae Grimes as Darcy Edwards
- Lisa Karpov as Pretty girl
- Jonathan Keltz as Nate
- Mike Lobel as Jay Hogart
- Linlyn Lue as Laura Kwan
- Tom Melissis as Dom Perino
- James Taylor as Nigel
Absences
- Daniel Clark as Sean Cameron
- Lauren Collins as Paige Michalchuk
- Jake Goldsbie as Toby Isaacs
- Aubrey Graham as Jimmy Brooks
- Shane Kippel as Spinner Mason
- Andrea Lewis as Hazel Aden
- Pat Mastroianni as Joey Jeremiah
- Stacie Mistysyn as Caitlin Ryan
- Adamo Ruggiero as Marco Del Rossi
- Dan Woods as Daniel Raditch
Jay: "Now there's a loaded question."
Emma: "Everyone's been acting like I belong in a straight-jacket."
Jay: "That's their problem. You're no weirder than the rest of us."
Ashley: "Which she loves. I didn't think you'd mind."
Craig: "Well, then you didn't think at all."
Jay: "What do you think's in the van?"
Emma: Beer, more beer, smelly shag carpeting from the 70's..."
Craig: About who? Crazy Craig?"
Craig: "I know."
Ellie: "And what's bizarre is that I'm always gonna be a cutter. Even if I don't do it for years, it's still me."
Craig: "Well, that sucks."
Ellie: "It just - it just is. It doesn't matter how I feel or how anyone else feels."
Craig: "I'm bipolar. And apparently it doesn't matter if I think that sucks either."
Ellie: "They think Kurt Cobain was bipolar."
Craig: "Yeah."
Ellie: "If he accepted it, maybe it all would have been different. Nigel from group manages okay."
Craig: "He seemed cool."
Ellie: "He is! You should come back. And you should probably call Ash."
Craig: "Why? Why? 'Cause I bit her head off in the middle of the school."
Ellie: "Yeah, maybe 'cause of that."
Craig: "All she talks about lately is my medication, my shrink and my moods."
Ellie: "She cares about you. A lot."
Craig: "I know."