“Jesus, Etc. (2)”
Season 10, Episode 38
March 11, 2011
March 11, 2011
Fitz reveals to Clare that he's a reformed Christian and needs her help. Clare is torn between her faith and her promise to Eli. Alli is missing. Sav is sure she’s just being a drama queen. K.C. and Jenna babysit a 6-year-old to test their parenting readiness.
Fitz continues to talk to Clare, but she is still skeptical of his newfound faith. She becomes creeped out when he sends her numerous emails about his faith and worry for her and Eli throughout the night. She goes to The Dot, demanding to know why he was sending her emails at 3 AM. He insists he was bored and couldn't sleep thus going to an internet cafe and is just doing so out of worry for a friend. She is skeptical of his story and is clearly worried about him. Meanwhile, she is also writing a story with Eli for his assignment.
Clare is on the phone, talking to Eli and discussing that he should come over when someone knocks on her door. She hangs up on Eli and goes to open the door. She is shocked when a bruised and beaten Fitz is on her doorstep in the middle of a heavy storm, claiming he fell off his bike and he has nowhere else to go. Clare lets him in and helps him out of decency. She suggests she dry off his clothes and notices a large welp on his chest when he takes off his sweater, which makes her question his story.
Fitz soon confesses that he didn't fall off his bike; his step brother, a drug addict, beat him up and has been doing so on a regular basis. Clare begins feeling bad for Fitz and sympathizes with him until he begins confessing that he has feelings for her and how she was the only thing that got him through his days in juvie. He says she should be with him and that Eli is nothing than bad news. However, Clare firmly says she loves Eli.
Things get messy when Eli arrives just as Fitz is about to leave. Clare calls out to Eli to give her a second and tries to sneak Fitz out of the back door. However, Eli comes in anyway and sees him. Eli is clearly furious to see Fitz in Clare's house and she says she only took him because any other person with a heart would. When Eli demands to know if she thinks he's "some kind of heartless monster", Clare blurts out, "Sometimes!" Eli is shellshocked and leaves the house, while Fitz shouts at him, "Clare and I have a special connection!" Clare gives Fitz a phone and tells him to call Father Greg to pick him up.
A little while later, he doe just so while Clare goes into Eli's hearse to comfort Eli. She is surprised to see him crying when he lifts his head up. Eli confesses that he fears that she's "slipping away" and that he can't stop it. Eli begs her to promise that she will never leave him, which she does and holds him to her.
The next day at school, Eli has finally finished the horror story he has been working on and is clearly proud of it. Clare is excited to hear how he changed the ending, only to be heavily disturbed when he tells her its graphic ending. In which the main protagonist, Malcolm (punned as Eli) realizes he needs to save the heroine Rachel (punned as Clare) from the antagonist, Stalkerangel. Clare then naturally guesses, "So he kills Stalkerangel." Eli, however, says that, instead of killing Stalkerangel, Malcolm kills her by slitting her throat and drinks her blood so they can forever become "one". Eli then calls it a "true horror story" and that it is his "masterpiece".
The episode ends with Eli confessing his love for Clare in front of the entire school by loudly declaring "I love Clare Edwards!". He wraps his arm around an obviously freaked out Clare, who is becoming more and more alarmed by his increasingly possessive behavior towards her.
After Alli and Sav's big fight the previous night, Alli won’t come down in the morning when her parents call her for breakfast. The Bhandari’s quickly realize she isn’t ignoring them. Sav assumes Alli is just being dramatic and isn’t worried. At school, Sav can’t seem to concentrate. Even Holly J.'s talk of bikini’s and lesbians can’t get his attention.
When she finally gets his attention, Sav tells her about Alli's disappearance, and that she is just being "a drama queen". Holly J., however, fears it may be more than that. Mr. Simpson then tells Sav that his mother needs him at home right away. Mrs. Bhandari is getting increasingly worried, so when Sav comes home she asks him to hack into Alli’s computer and try to find some clues as to where she’s gone.
Sav successfully hacks into Alli's account and discovers a journal entry that Alli wrote. As it turns out, Alli has been far more upset than anyone in the family has realized. They become alarmed when they read her latest journal entry, which reveals how she has come to thinks her family will be better off without her. Sav and Mr. Bhandari try driving around the city in hopes of finding Alli. Mr. Bhandari tells Sav that Alli will be in big trouble when she gets home, but Sav points out that her rebellion and lack of being listened to is the reason she ran away in the first place, and that yelling and punishing her will not solve anything. Despite his best efforts, Mr. Bhandari refuses to listen to him. However, he later breaks down into tears.
Alli’s been missing long enough that the police are now involved. The police officer on the case comes by the house with some footage from a coffee shop near Alli’s new school. The tape shows Alli getting into a car with someone, but no one can make out the license plate or who is behind the wheel.
K.C. and Jenna test their parenting skills by babysitting a boy named Caleb from their pregnancy class teacher, Blair (her son). They think they are ready, but are annoyed by Caleb's irrational behavior. However, they find that not being overprotective of him makes the job easier. The plot ends with Caleb's annoying overbearing mother taking him home, and K.C. and Jenna finally feel like parents.
- This episode is named after the song "Jesus, Etc." by Wilco.
- Eli admits that he loves Clare.
- Fitz admits to Clare that he has feelings for her.
- Fitz admits to Clare that he has a step-brother and he is abusive to him.
- Holly J. mentions her sister, Heather, in this episode. She hasn't been mentioned since the season 8 episode Money for Nothing.
- This episode marks the last appearance of Mark "Fitz" Fitzgerald.
Regular Cast (Ordered Alphabetically)
- Raymond Ablack as Sav Bhandari
- Charlotte Arnold as Holly J. Sinclair
- Stefan Brogren as Archie Simpson
- Munro Chambers as Eli Goldsworthy
- Sam Earle as K.C. Guthrie
- Aislinn Paul as Clare Edwards
- Melinda Shankar as Alli Bhandari
- Jessica Tyler as Jenna Middleton
- Luke Bilyk as Drew Torres
- Annie Clark as Fiona Coyne
- Jahmil French as Dave Turner
- Alicia Josipovic as Bianca DeSousa
- Argiris Karras as Riley Stavros
- Daniel Kelly as Owen Milligan
- Shannon Kook-Chun as Zane Park
- Cory Lee as Winnie Oh
- Landon Liboiron as Declan Coyne
- Jajube Mandiela as Chantay Black
- Samantha Munro as Anya MacPherson
- AJ Saudin as Connor DeLaurier
- Jordan Todosey as Adam Torres
- Spencer Van Wyck as Wesley Betenkamp
- (Fitz to Clare): "Me and you? We have a spiritual connection."
- (Eli to Fitz): "I have nothing to say to you."
- (Eli to Clare): "I just feel like you're slipping away."
- (Eli to Clare): "Don't leave me, okay? Please."
- (Clare to Fitz): "You're cyber stalking me in the middle of the night?"
- (Holly J. to Sav): "That really makes me wonder if I should take up lesbianism."
- (Sav to Holly J.): "Spoiler alert! Alli's gone."
- (Clare to Fitz): "What about your parents?" (Fitz) "I'm the least of their worries."
- (K.C. to Jenna): "Bubble boy's gone demonic!"
- (Clare to Fitz): "I love Eli... and Eli loves me."
- (Fitz to Clare): "Eli will never change and you know it."
- (Eli): "What are you saying? That I'm some heartless monster?" (Clare): "Sometimes!"
- (Clare to Eli): "Great, just try not to kill me...kay?"
- (Blair): "I'm guessing it wasn't an organic hotdog?"
- (Mr. Bhandari): "Your mother and I love you and Alliah, but it's not easy raising children. I hope one day you are lucky enough to know that."
- (Eli): "The hero Malcolm realizes he can never protect his heroine Rachel from Stalker/Angel so he has no choice but to--"
(Clare): "Kill Stalker/Angel." (Eli): "No, he kills Rachel. He grabs his knife, cuts her throat, drinks her blood and forever they are one."
(Clare): "That's...disturbing." (Eli): "It's brilliant...wouldn't be much of a horror story otherwise."
- (Eli): "It's all about YOU, Clare!"
- "The Sky is Breaking Up Jim" by Mark Boone - Heard when Eli is crying inside Morty and at the end.
- "The Only Way" by Clare Burson - Heard when Clare walks in on Eli sitting alone in the classroom.
- "God Keep Our Hands Clean" by FemBots - Heard when Clare finds the emails from Fitz.
- "Amazing" by The Red Directors - Heard playing in the background when Clare confronts Fitz at The Dot.
- "Daydreaming" by Dark Dark Dark - Heard when Sav and Mr. Bhandari are driving around looking for Alli.